Why ADHD New Year Goals Backfire (and What Works Instead)

Without fail, every-single-January, my inbox is full of emails from every single company I’ve ever purchased from (or even visited the website of). They’re attempting to sell planners, protein powders, and productivity ~vibes~. 

 

Meanwhile, I’m just trying to remember what day it is and what I need to do next.

 

January (and the powers that be) want you to reinvent yourself. And, while reinvention has a time and place, it’s probable that your ADHD brain just wants a nap.

 

Whether it’s resolutions, all-or-nothing discipline, or life overhauls, ADHD brains completely short-circuit under that kind of pressure.

 

You want change, but you don’t do well with the kind of change that comes with inevitable failure and shame. It’s a catch-22 that I’m right there with you on.

 

Knowing the types of behaviors and changes we need is the first step to accomplishing ADHD New Year goals.

 

It’s not about giving up completely on goals. We just need to approach change in a way that your ADHD brain can actually appreciate and thrive with.

 

 

 

Why ADHD New Year Goals Backfire (and What Works Instead)

 

 

 

Big Goals Create Big Pressure (And ADHD Brains Feel It First)

Let me start by saying that New Year’s resolutions can work. The promise of a fresh “New Year, New You” start can be motivational. But, even for neurotypical people, only about 6% of superhuman cyborgs stick to resolutions all year.

 

For ADHD brains, the bigger the goal, the more pressure we feel. Our brains are already more sensitive to pressure and overwhelm. Add a huge goal to that, and you’re likely to find us shaking and crying in the corner on day 3.

 

This is often the case for two reasons.

 

Big, vague goals feel emotionally loaded. The typical “get in shape” or “be more productive” can leave us wondering where to even start or what we’re truly trying to accomplish.

 

I don’t know about you, but I interpret nearly anything emotional (especially negative ones) as a “threat” instead of motivation.

 

This typically results in shutting down and avoidance or, in some cases, over-preparing and burning out.

 

When you have ADHD, your brain doesn’t see a huge goal and *get excited*. It usually wants to run in the opposite direction.

 

 

 

 

January Is Already Set Up to Fail (Before Goals Even Enter the Chat)

I don’t care what you’re trying to achieve, January is a hard month to try to achieve it in.

 

January in the Northern Hemisphere is cold, dark, and weirdly long. You’re susceptible to the January blues, and it can be tough to want to get out of bed, much less crush a million goals.

 

I’ve noticed, year after year, that my energy in January is straight up low. My routines are disrupted, and bills from the holiday season are due.

 

It’s not exactly the best and most vibey month for radical transformation.

 

Yet, society insists that January is the *perfect* time to “overhaul your life.”

 

Reminder: If you’re unable to set or keep goals in January, you’re not failing or lazy. You wouldn’t fault a car for not starting on an empty tank. You should treat yourself the same way.

 

 

 

 

RELATED: So Long, Same Old Routine: 10 Ideas to Spark Change and Start Fresh in the New Year

 

 

 

 

Why “Fresh Start Energy” Ends Fast for ADHD Brains

Have you ever thought about why we ADHDers often fall into the “fresh start” trap? 

 

Even though I know better, I still find myself slipping into “I’ll start x in January” thinking.

 

This is because ADHD brains (and humans in general) crave novelty. “Fresh start” energy equals a novelty dopamine hit, which feels ah-mazing and super exciting at first.

 

But ADHD motivation often hinges on that novelty instead of the consistency needed to see goals and habits through. 

 

When the *sparkle* and *newness* of something wears off, so does the follow-through.

 

That drop-off is to be expected, it’s how brain chemistry works for ADHDers.

 

That’s why we tend to procrastinate, abandon goals entirely, or start new goals mid-month (i.e., shiny object syndrome). It’s also why we tend to call ourselves “lazy” or feel like we’re failing. It’s the start of the shame spiral.

 

 

 

 

 

The All-or-Nothing Trap of New Year’s Resolutions

I think I could fill all the empty notebooks I’ve bought over the years just writing down New Year’s resolutions I started and immediately stopped at the first sign of imperfection.

 

I’m definitely a victim of the classic “all-or-nothing” ADHD trap. The one that says that if it’s not perfect, it doesn’t count.

 

For example:

• Missing one workout = Not going back to the gym for an entire year (like at New Year’s again).
• Skipping a journaling session = A notebook (or ten) piling up and collecting dust on your nightstand.
• Seeing a TikTok video about a person waking up at 5 AM to write a novel by January 12th = Results in you putting off your 50 words a day writing goal because you can’t compete.

Consistency can be an issue when you have ADHD, but it’s not just the consistency itself. It’s the rigidity that truly makes follow-up nearly impossible.

 

The second something feels like a “rule”, our brains want out.

 

The thing we often forget is that consistency doesn’t necessarily have to mean daily. It can mean coming back to something over time. That’s still completely valid and still a win.

 

 

 

 

RELATED: Your ADHD Winter Routine: Gentle, Cozy, and Zero Pressure

 

 

 

 

What to Do Instead (Without Giving Up on Growth)

So, now that you understand why ADHD New Year goals often backfire, you may be wondering what you can do instead.

 

I mean, naturally, you likely have goals that you want to achieve, and you’re looking for ways to get there.

 

Luckily, there are still gentle and effective ways we can accomplish what we want without pain or shame.

 

Here’s what to try:

 

1. Focus on Direction, Not Outcomes

Instead of “Lose 20 pounds,” try: “I want to feel stronger and more energized.”

Vibes can be a great way to stay engaged without setting milestones. Just be sure to incorporate specific actions so you’re moving in the right direction incrementally, without having to be militant about it.

 

 

2. Pick One Feeling You Want More Of

Do you want to feel calmer, more confident, or have more autonomy? Choose a feeling or something that you want more of, and build around that feeling. 

This eliminates the typical “rigid goalpost” that makes it so difficult for ADHD brains to stick to something. It also keeps you in the mental space that you desire, and good vibes go a long way.

 

 

3. Let January Be a Soft Start

Did you know that you really don’t have to start goals in January? Think of the first month of the year as the “beta version” of your year. It’s a safe space to try habits on, tweak routines and mindsets, and ease into the year.

Try not to pressure yourself into committing fully. The year is just starting, you have time to adjust.

 

More Ideas:

• “I want to have a calm morning 2x a week.”
• “I’d like to remember to eat lunch before 3 p.m.”
• “I’m experimenting with doing less, not more.”

You can choose whatever vibe feels right for you. The goal is not to fall victim to the pressure while still aiming for growth. If you need more ideas, I talk about more ways to start the New Year and aim for growth in gentle, ADHD-friendly ways.
 

 

 

Where Gentle Change Actually Happens

As someone who has kept New Year’s resolutions over the years, despite having ADHD and failing many other times, I can say that there are three keys to remember.

• One: You can start fresh ADHD new year goals and habits whenever you want. You don’t have to wait for a Monday, or a new month, or even the next day. Feel free to start new habits and goals mid-month, mid-week, or mid-snack.
• Two: Tiny changes do work. You don’t have to make huge, transformative moves for every goal (at least not all at once). Making small, tiny changes is effective, especially when done consistently-ish.
• Three: Progress doesn’t require a fancy new planner and a color-coded vision board (although those can be fun). The primary key to growth is effort and continuing when it doesn’t feel meaningful. That’s when breakthroughs happen.

 

 

 

 

RELATED: Beat the January Blues: A 5 Step Stress-Free Survival Guide

 

 

 

 

The Takeaway: January Doesn’t Have to Be a Makeover Month

ADHD can sometimes make accomplishing goals seem impossible. 

 

Add the pressure of January and traditional New Year’s “reinvention, and you’ll likely feel like throwing in the towel before you even begin.

 

But January doesn’t need to be the month where you fix everything (or even half your life). It can be the month where you stop being so hard on yourself and start building towards something sustainable.

 

You can grow and achieve with ADHD, especially when you prioritize being gentle with yourself and strive to be consistent most of the time rather than being perfect.

 

Remember: Gentleness is productive, and soft starts are valid. The sky is the limit from there.